How could I be in love with him, how did I think he would leave her for me?

“Dria  … What’s wrong Earl had tried to grab me but I rushed through the living room and darted out the door

 I couldn’t tell him the truth as to why I was in tears… Or could I?

                 I started to turn back around but then it hit me, telling him the truth would only make it worse I don’t need to deal with anymore shit

So I continue to rush back down to the lobby to meet lysine

I had finally gotten to the lobby and sat for a while and waited on her

                I had gotten a call from Ben J wondering what had happen to Alex

“Yeah man she just rushed down to the lobby, lysine told me she’d go get her and to just stay here “

“ dawg I don’t know ,I knocked on the door to just say what’s up on my way back to the room when I could her crying no one would answer so you know I figure d I’d come and tell you “

                 I knew what was wrong with her and before she can make this a huge crazy thing I decided to go talk to her myself

Mila was occupied with Giselle so I snook out the room before she could notice I was gone

                As I to the lobby floor I could see lynise heading towards her, before she could reach her I tugged her on the shoulder

Aye let me speak to her

“Chris you’ve done enough, please just let her be “

“Just let me talk to her “I pleaded with her

“I don’t think it’s smart it’s no telling what she’ll do if she sees you right now “

“Fuck it “I headed towards her

“Chris” She whispered low enough so Alex would hear her and turn her pain filled body around to only find the person who had placed it there face.

“Let me get her outside and calm her down come out in 5 minutes”

“Iight “

It had to be the longest 5 minutes of my life

“Lynise why me, why is this happening to me what did me do so wrong “

 I didn’t know how to respond to her questioning all I could do was walk towards her with open arms

 She continued to sob as if she was mourning a lost love one

“Alexandria, you gotten let him go he’s no good for you “

 “I LOVE HIM “she screamed at me as she revealed her blood shot red eyes, she had looked up pass me and just froze.

 I couldn’t wait any longer I had to go out there

I walked looking for her when I heard “I Love Him” coming from a left direction

There she was face full of tears and voice full of pain and regret staring at me from 5 feet away

 How could I cause this much pain to a person

We both just froze I tried to read her mind before I made a move towards her  cause mine was all confused  with racing thoughts:

I could leave Mila but I couldn’t imagine what pain I’d cause her if I were to up and leave her just like that.

                But what do I do about Alexandria?

Before I could even realize I had felt a harsh stingy sensation come across my face

“I hate you “

I quickly grabbed her by the wrist before she could turn away

“GET OFF OF ME NOW “

“Alex relaxes; calm the fuck down “angry began to build up inside me

“Let me fucking go NOWWWWW!” she screams at me while still struggling to break free from me

“Listen to me, listen to me I ‘m not leaving Mila…”

“Chris let her go, just let her go “

“Lynise shut up”

“Now listen … I like you a lot and who knows it could turn to love, but  I can’t just up and leave her like that I love her .” she stopped struggling and just looked up at me with her  panged brown eye  as the  Mac black eyeliner and Mascara  ran down her cheeks  darken under her eyes

“I- lo-ve you, and YOU WILL NEVER UNDERSTAND THE PAIN YOU PUT ME THROUGH” somehow she managed to take off into the darken night of the city that never sleeps

“Go after her!!!!” Lynise yelled to me

“Call Legacy and tell them what happen “

As I run after her she turns the corner and that’s where I lost her, after making that turn it was like she disappeared.

                 This wasn’t like her she’d never run off into the dark like this why now?

“ legacy tell everyone we need help looking for Alexandria she ran off Chris is trying to run after her but  he told me to call you “

“ iight imam have everyone come down “

 This night couldn’t get any crazier could it ?

                I had watched Chris search for me down the street from the alley I had cut across to before he could reach the turn I had made before.

I just wanted to be alone, I didn’t want to talk to anyone, the only person that could take this pain away was Chris and he himself refused to do so

                I had nowhere to go I was roaming my drained body through the street with nothing but socks and the dress Chris had given me earlier in the day  

 A few hours had pass and I had notice the bar that wasn’t too far from the hotel, when I went out shopping with Ben J I had noticed   I decided to take that way back to the hotel

The bar was full of people enjoying their night

“ ahh almost back home “ I just want lay down ri- —-

It had to be about 2 hours when I decided to head back to the hotel room and just wait for her to come back

It isn’t that cold out  but she still didn’t need to be out in the

“ Chrisssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss pleaseeeeeeeee Chris… “  was crying out for me but I could see anyone

“ CHRissss” the person cried out

Please don’t let it be Alex please …

“ Ahhhhhhhhhhh” could finally be found coming from a dark alley

As I entered I could only see a body lying there , being unsure I slowly approached  Alex’s blood covered face

“ Nooo , noo , noo “ I began to plead

“911 emergency “

“Ambulance now pleaseeee near the pub near the Marytin  … I mean Marriot pleaseeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee nowwwwwwwwwww “

 I couldn’t believe my eyes, the once black eyeliner covered face full of tears was now what looked like I was being disguised with a red mask.

He just smiled at me and bit his , oh was it sexy as shit when he did that he made me wanna drop on him and just take him down

” Aye what are you up to ?”

“ I was going to check on Lynise and she what she was up to , where are you headed “

“ She at the party and I was headed to the front desk for something “

“ Oh okay, well I guess I’ll just head back to the room cause I’m not for the party right now “

“ You wanna come with me down their “ I mean it wasn’t going to hurt  I was already in his presence

“ Sure “

“ iight , aye I left my shirt in the room ; you right want to give that back to me before he comes back to the room “

“ oh yeah that would be smart “ he walked down to the room

“ Aye don’t try anything Maurice “

“ Open the door Alex”

“NOPE” he lifted me up over his shoulder took the room key and open the door ..

” Put me downnnnn ” I said giggling as he tickled me

“ I gave you door to door service ma’am , my tip ?”

” your not suppose to ask me, now PUT ME DOWN NOW ! “

” Alright you asked for it, now I have to take my tip” man I swear he was bad but I liked his bad side he was so freaky, I love the way he gave me the business, but I was trying things with Ben J. Chris picked me up and throw me on the couch and climbed on top of me

” Maurice , NO!”

” Well where’s my tip then “

” Ughh your not getting one”

That’s when he started unzippering his pants , I reallly did want the tip he was going to give me but I couldn’t do that again

” Alright chris alright” I lifted up and kissed him on the cheek

” For real after I gave you door to door service a kiss on the check ma’am?“

I gave him kiss on the other cheek at this point he had my leg wrapped around his waist

” Fuck that shit “

“Maurice please don’t, we can’t do this again” he didn’t care he took longstroke Mcgee out and placed him on the inner part of my thigh

” Now am I going to get my tip ?

” What tip do you want Maurice?” he smirked at me and then …

” Uhh Mauriceeeeeeee” he had pushed himself inside me and began to stroke

“But I’ll settle for a nice kiss on the lips”

He pulled himself out and started kissing me I swear he was going to get me and him in trouble if he didn’t cut it out. For some strange reason I loved sneaking around with him but it wasn’t fair to Earl soo I stopped

” Alright Maurice , enough ” I gave him one more kiss and then moved from under him

“You coming to the pa-“

“Fuck no”

“The fuck you mean?”

” Umm, fuck no I’m not coming, I’ll beat your girls ass again if she look at me the wrong way again Maurice you better tell her little ass something” he just laugh

” Ya’ll need to get along so I can 3 that , ya’ll could both get it “

” Umm fuck you and your bitch I won’t be joining any type of 3 some unless it’s with my sister “

” Well we can make that happen to !” He said so innocently

” Fuck noooo”

” Well she asked me about you and me before I came down here “

” Forreal what did she say”

” Nothing reallly just what was up was all “And what did you say” he had a look on his face

” Nothing at all I ignored the question”

I knew he was lying

” Yeah okay, well um I’m about to get ready for bed .. oh wait I didn’t appreciate you talking that shit you talked earlier  ”

“ what ?”

“When you girl caught you basically , good cover but don’t ever talk to me like that again else it’s going to be a problem”

“ I had to say something you know “

“ Yeah Yeah Ye-“ He lifted my chin to his face with his strong manly hand and kissed me before I could finish what I was saying

” I hope I see you again Alex”

” I guess Maurice ”

” You guess ? ” He questioned me as if the kiss changed my answer

” Maurice , gooo “

” Alright ” he gave me a smirked I swear I loved when his dimple would show on the side of his cheek

” Bye” I closed the door and dropped to the floor ,ughh I love being around him but …

” Maurice ” he was already standing on the side of the door as if he knew I was going to call him back .

” Waddup”

” Well shit , I thought you left .”

” Naw I had a feeling you were going to need me to come back “

” Shut up , but anyways … Leave Mila!”

” Leave Mila ?”

” Yes , Leave Mila!”

” I can’t …”

” Why not, you like me right ?”

” Yeah I do , but I just can’t up and drop her , I still love her. Al-“

” Nevermind you said all I needed to know” I slammed the door .

” Alex open the door “

I walked away as he knocked a few more times.

” Why meeeee” I shouted out

” Why am I going through this, why did he have to kiss me ” began to sob until I heard the door open again I ran to the bathroom and turned on the shower

” Aye dria , where you at ” I didn’t respond to the voice “

*bang bang bang *

There were three knocks at the door

” Whatttttt!” I lashed out

” It’s me you alright , Chris said he walked pass the door and heard crying and couldn’t get in .

” It was the TV “

” Oh iight , hurry up out the shower so I can talk to you “

He wanted to talk to me but for what !?

I really felt like my song of the moment was j cole workout , cause we had a good thing we don’t know if we’ll see one another again but is that a good thing cause he’s making it seem like he can’t be my man now what’s on my brain is the hope that it’ll never end like was it the real thing or was I just a one night stand ? He wanted me for one night to see how far I would go he wanted to put the pipe on me and keep his girl.

I walked out the bathroom and went straight for my phone to call Lynise

Still crying Ben J was worried

” Dria what’s wronggg, talk to me !”

” Noo leave me alone ” I walked towards the living room to get away from him

” Dria did I do something wrong ” he came closer to me

” Please just leave me alone please Ben J “

I walked out the door

” Hello lynise I need you right now I can’t do it “

” What the fuck happen “

“Just meet me in the lobby now!” I demanded her

“alright, I’m coming now “

I was an emotional wreck, kept saying I need to leave him alone and then I’d go back on my word. I mean it’s not that easy he’s Chris brown and I was in love with him.

(Ben J)

Damn , she looks soo good. She started walking towards me I was loving her in that dress man the way it hugged her curves and boy did she have a sexy pair of legs on her , yeah she was taller than me but she was on some model status soo it went right with my swag.

“Hey” she gave me a smile along with a hug

” Hey boo how you are “

” I’m good I’m happy to see you ,I thought you’d never come back “

We headed out to soho to do a little shopping at first she didn’t want to get anything but I basically had the force her to get stuff I was treating her to a little shopping spree she wanted to go to forever 21 so we headed back to Manhattan

” Aye I’m going to give you my card spend as much as you want , I gotta make a call”

” Umm are you sure Earl ?”

” Dria if you don’t go get what you want “

” Alright ” she headed into the store as I made reservation to  this little Italian restaurant , I waited out in the car because I didn’t want to stir up a crowd I just wanted to spend time with her without the media all in my business

Ring…Ring…Ring

” Aye bruh wass hannin”

“Waadddup”

” We up here chilling, so when ya’ll get back come holla”

” Iight we should be back in a little we heading to soho for a little “

” Iight I holla “

That was Chris I guess him and his people were throwing a party or whatever. It was about an hour she had spent in that store when she finally came out with all her bags, she had to go back and get the rest of her bags .

” Dang did you buy up the whole store or something” I joked around with her

” You said buy stuff soo I did earl , I can take it back “

“I’m just playing boo” I gave her a kiss on the lips and helped her back into the limo” you look soo good dria, you don’t understand “she moved closer to me and sooner than I know her soft mac covered lips were pressed upon mine

“Aye I’m taking you out to dinner we’re heading there now “

“Earl you don’t have to do this for me , it’s not that important we can stay in and eat “

“Naw I want you to enjoy yourself” we were finally pulling up no TMZ in site thank gooodness.

“Reservation of earl for two” we were seated towards the back so we weren’t noticed .She seemed so happy and I was happy she was enjoying herself.

” I really appreciate this Earl, you didn’t hav- “

” I wanted to do this for you don’t worry about it just enjoy it”

She smiled and leaned across the table to kiss me once more.

” Hi how are you two today”

” We’re fine”

” Would you like to start off with something to drink?”

“Yea ummm , just get me a cherry coke and Alex…”

” I’d like a Shirley temple can you make sure it’s sweet please”

” Yeah I will make sure “

” Shirley temple ?” I laughed at her

” Yeah it’s the only thing I drink , but anyways how was the meeting ?”

“ It was alright, I mean we was just talking about the tour and shit and some other shit for the next album”

“ hmm sounds like a lot of fun”

“ ye-“

” Here you guys are , would you like to order now ? “

” Yes please I’d like the chicken Alfredo with extra sauce”

“And I’d like regular spaghetti”

” Alright your food will be out shortly “

“ But like I was saying it was alright nothing major  right now”

“ Hmm , true” she started looking around scanning her surroundings, The atmosphere was romantic we were both laughing and enjoying the night .

” So are you excited for the rest of the tour?” she asked me trying to make more conversation

” Yeah I’m excited I mean it won’t be as good as New York’s concert “

” Why is that ?” She questioned

” I mean because you won’t be there “

She smirked and broke eye contact with me

” You’ll find another girl way better looking than me and fall for her “

” Naw Dria I reallly like you a lot “

Her face got serious, she still didn’t make any eye contact with me

” I want to get to know you more “

” I’d like the same too earl .” I was happy she felt the same way our food had come out and we enjoyed the rest of the time there we finally headed outside, where I was greeted by fans and hands flying everywhere looking for an autograph I rushed Alexandria back into the limo before any photos could be taken of her, I signed a couple autographs and headed back to the hotel.

” Aye chris is having a party you want to come?”

” No I’m going to put my stuff away relax you go and have fun “

” You sure I’ll stay with you “

” No its okay go have fun I’ll be okay I got my bag don’t worry about me you did enough of that tonight”

We had finally reached our floor and I helped her with her bags and then headed to  Mijo’s room

I could hear the music as I turned the corner mijo’s room was on the same floor but on  the other side of the building ,I don’t they’d here me at the door .

  ( Chris )

I answered the door and it was Ben J , no Alex in site

” What’s up homie “

” Nothing chilling chilling just getting back from taking Alexandria out you know had to spend some time and money on her “

” Yeah I got Mila some stuff as well for later if you know what I mean “

” Ha ha you too funny dude”

I guess she ain’t got time to kick it with us dang I was hoping she was going to come by for a little

” Aye I’ll be back, someone left something at the front desk for me “

“Mila I’ll be back moms said someone left something for me at the front desk “

 I headed down to her room to see what was up with her, I had turned the corner and to my surprised it was her walking towards me, I tried not to smile but it was an automatic thing for me every time I saw her face.

Oh I had so much fun man, he was so nice to do that for me I wanted him to enjoy his time with his friends and I really didn’t want to see Chris; we needed time a part.

I was headed to Legacy’s room to see what Lynise was up to when I saw his tall light skin self walking towards me. Man what was he doing over here?

“Relax, Mila it isn’t that serious she’s just trying to get under your skin because she wants what you got and she can’t have me “

“Yeah I shouldn’t let her do that because she knows she’s getting the best of me when I react like that” she had grabbed my hand as we walked towards my brother Mijo’s room

“ Why we going to Mijo’s room ?”

“ He told me to come down “

“ Oh “

 I couldn’t help but think about how I was Going through all this shit with Alex, to actually see her in tears and pour her heart out to me, I started to catch feelings. Reading her letter I had felt some type of way because I could see in her soul that she truly meant every word she said my mistake was letting my feelings get the best of me and kissing her in the wardrobe room it felt like the right time but I really didn’t expect her to kiss me in front of that whole crowd.

“Aye waddddup homie ” MIJO my brother greeted me

” What’s good” I guess everyone was ready to party but I was trying to relax get my mind together. I had looked to my left, legacy and Alex’s friend I think her name was Lynise not sure but they were sitting there chilling I headed to my room when I head a female’s voice come up behind me it was Lynise

” Hey where’s Alexandria?” The voice questioned but by then I knew it had been Lynise.

” She went shopping with Ben J “she had a puzzled look on her face when he looked at me and Mila

” Oh okay can I speak to you though in private if you don’t mind “

” Sure. Come with me out into the hall” what did she want? I hope she doesn’t ask me anything about Alexandria  we headed out the door when I heard Mila’s voice wasn’t sure what she said as I headed towards the door “babe I’ll be right back “

“So what was with you and my sister?” I knew she was going to ask me something about Alex I just knew it

” Nothing is going on , that’s all you wanted to know ?

” It has to be something you kissed her more than once, she’s my sister she talks to me Chris” I was hoping Alex didn’t mention anything to anyone but I mean she is a fan and she was bound to tell someone

” I like her for some odd reason but I have a girl , I don’t want to mess it up with Mila and me, especially because I most likely won’t see Alex anymore”

” If you really wanted to you could make it work with Alex, I think she’d be the best thing you’ve ever did” I just looked at her and smiled if she only knew I did her already” I don’t mean in that way” she continued with a smirk it was like she read my mind.

Ring…Ring ..Rin-

” Hello”

” Come back inside, what is taking you so long”

“Mila I’m coming , relax I’m not with Alex shit” I swear she would die if she wasn’t under my ass 24/7

” I’m going to head back inside, before she goes crazy” we both laughed and headed back to the room.

I just wanted to see where they were so I decided to call ben j

” Aye bruh wass hannin”

“Waadddup”

” We up here in Mijo room chilling, so when ya’ll get back come holla”

” Iight we should be back in a little we heading to SoHo for a little “

” Iight I holla “

I don’t know why I felt jealous as if she was my girl, what is going on with me

“Babe” I was brought back to the hotel room by her voice,

I glanced at Mila on the couch next to Giselle. There were bottles and weed going around the room everyone was just chilling and having fun, hours passed I had glanced at my watch a few times wondering if I was going to get a chance to see her again , when the door rang .